No Remaining Balance

My mom is a first grade teacher, and apparently one of her other teacher friends has a daughter who is in law school at Regent.  She is also a third year student.  On the day after my birthday when my mom played hooky and took me shopping for the day, we had to stop by her school first so she could help her student teacher with something, and I met the woman whose daughter is also in law school.  She asked me if I was having trouble with my bar application, and I responded that I had already finished it and sent it in.  Not an agreeable process, to be sure, but one that I made a priority and got done as quickly as I could.  This batty woman went on and on about the struggles her daughter had to go to to fill in the application (citing, for example, details of her daughter's messy divorce and how she had to get doctor's notes to document her bi-polar disorder) and how much it had vexed her to hear about it.

For the record, I really do think that it is awfully nosy of the bar examiners to require that we provide details of our medical records if we've been treated for certain conditions.  Luckily for me, though, I haven't.  And if I thought that I might need to be, now I would most certainly put treatment off so that I did not have to disclose it.  It seems like there ought to be some things that truly remain confidential--and what I've said to my doctor, and what he (or she) has prescribed to make my life a little easier should be my own personal business.  I understand that people with certain conditions can be somewhat unstable, but to have gotten through three years of law school (in addition to four years of undergrad) and a ridiculously complicated bar exam application suggests that these applicants do have some degree of stability and I think (of course what I think doesn't much matter) that they should be given the benefit of the doubt at the outset.  After all, we've accomplished a lot.

Enough of that.  Anyway, the woman went on to ask who was going to Roanoke with me.  With me?  I was so confused by the question.  I go to school in a different state and everyone that I know from high school or college who ended up attending law school is either a year before or a year behind me, so there's no one to really go with.  And even if I could, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't.  She then asked if my mom was going.  My mom?  Why would my mom go?  I was so confused.  She continued on, saying that her daughter (who is more than ten years older than me, by the way) was scared to go to Roanoke alone and had urged BOTH of her parents to come with her.  So homegirl is coming to take the bar exam, both parents in tow.  I guess mom can sharpen her #2 pencils before she goes in to take the exam.

It seems quite silly to me.  At this point, the only thing my parents can do to help me is to pay.  And I certainly don't need them there to do that.  In fact, I am going to need everyone to disappear for a couple of days so that I can really focus on what I need to do.  I don't need someone else in the shower when I need to get going, or someone who wants to dawdle over dinner when I need to get back and study.  I don't need people talking or watching TV or making noise of any kind when I don't want noise to be made.  Maybe I'm a hermit, but I really passionately feel like I need to be on my own for a couple days.

Today, I paid for my BarBri review course in full (thanks mom and dad)--which seems like a pretty huge milestone.  I have been worrying about which course to pick and how to pay for it for a couple years now.  I'm not exactly looking forward to it, but knowing that I will have a course on my side to help me through the process is a really encouraging thought.

I never thought that "none of your courses have a remaining balance" could be such a comforting sentence.  But it's kind of like a little virtual hug, straight from BarBri to me.  Aww, shucks.  Thanks, BarBri.

I am very optimistic.  After all, BarBri has been sending encouraging emails all along about not needing another multistate prep course.  And there's pre-course stuff I can start to do now to prepare.  I'm a little neurotic, and it really does make me feel happier, safer, and more secure to do something about the things that cause me anxiety.  This was an item on my aforementioned to-do list that I can now cross off.

Select/pay for bar review course:  check.

After I finish up, I will have some three-four weeks before my course starts to do the pre-bar studying and also to enjoy myself a little bit.  Andy is getting his stuff together to start running fishing charters--shad fishing in the James River will begin in a week or two and he also starts to run saltwater charters in the Bay (or maybe even offshore for tuna or something) before too long.  Today, he has spent most of the day tying flies--and he even made one for me!  He calls it the Elle Woods.

He is so talented!  I've never done much fly fishing, but I do love the time that we spend fishing together--it's one of the best parts of the summer.  I hope that I really have a chance to do some fishing and spend some quality time with him before bar prep begins in earnest.  I will miss him tons and tons when I have to start to spend all of my days in the library.


Here we are, with the first cobia I ever caught, right after we first started dating. Sometimes, looking at pictures of the girl I was then, I really wish I could tell her how much better it can get--even though I wouldn't have thought it was possible.

My boyfriend is sexy.  Just sayin'.

Me, with the cobia, right after it was brought into the boat.  A little blood, but I don't mind.

I really hope that I get a few weeks of fun before I have to start studying, but, even so, it's really exciting to be so close to the end.  I kind of lost sight of my goal somewhere during the intervening years and had started to wonder if this was even what I wanted.  I do wish that I had maybe chosen a different (read: less expensive) school, maybe even one closer to home, but the closer I get to graduation, the more and more excited I get about having the life I always dreamed I would have.  There will be tons of time to play (and tons of fish to catch) after I pass the bar--and get a job.  After all, I didn't go to law school for my health.  I went to law school so I could live the life I've always wanted to live.  And I'm almost there.